Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Writing Blind

Funny how all of the sudden I cannot think of anything to say.

I thought a few days ago about how cool it would be to post my thoughts on the web for the world to see. The world would find my blog and ask for more. How quickly I have realized that the world is already here.

I have a bunch of questions at this point on how to set up this blogspot. Do I keep it simple? Do I spruce it up? How do I spruce it up? Does everybody else go through this? What types of topics shall I start with? Well at this point I only have one fan, counting me. I am really starting to feel like a grain of sand.

Well my one fan might enjoy this. Have you ever been in a cave? I once traveled to Wedowee, Alabama on business. Nearby was a tourist trap called DeSoto Caverns. It was off the beaten path. How much space do I have to write? The signs advertising DeSoto Caverns only advertised the cave. How surprised I was to see they had a miniature golf course as well. You pay your money to tour the cave in the gift shop. The person that takes your money seems erily famliar to your tour guide. Hope this thing has spell check.

I joined the others waiting for the tour to start. I was still dressed for work (shirt and tie). The two young ladies that were waiting for me and the tour guide were dressed more casual. They seemed very friendly, toward each other. The cave tour guide promised us a good time. Either she was a very keen observer or she was sticking to her prepared speech very well.

The tour guide promised us a total darkness experience we would never forget. She went thru the saftey portion of her speech. She was carrying a flashlight. If she did not return within one hour the other staff members would come in looking for us. Did you ladies see any other staff members? Sir do you have a question? No mam.

She opened the barn doors labeld "cave". Just kidding. Seriously she opened these great big doors that had a paved path that led to the entrance of the cave. She asked us to watch our step as things in the cave are damp sometimes wet. The outside light from the barn doors, sorry, the doors followed us in for about 60 yards. She starting telling us that they have lined the walking paths with lights so we could find our way easily. About the time the outside light was fading and the path lights were illuminating our way, she called out that we were approaching "the church".

"The church" as she called it was the largest room of the cave. It had three or four rows of wooden pews like a church. She asked us to sit down on a pew while she gave some more details and instructions. My fellow tourists sat next to each other hugging and giggled. I sat on the other side of the church. Our tour guide now minister began preaching about stalagmites and termites. Or was that stalactites, I do not remember, I was starting to nod off. I snapped back when she said "I will cut the lights and you not be able to see anything."

She said we would not be able to see our hands in front of our face. She said if we got stuck in the cave we would go blind in a matter of hours without any light. She started the count down. 3...2...1. CLICK! Sorry that is the best I can do with my typing skills. Sure enough I could not see anything. Total darkness. I tried to put my hand in front of my face, nothing. I even waved it back and forth. It was eerie. It was also very quiet. I screamed "WHAT IS THAT CRAWLING ON MY LEG!" Screams from the preacher and the other members of the congregation were heard. CLICK the lights were back on. I have never gotten more evil eyes at one time since that day. The three young ladies found absolutely no humor in what I had done.

I say all that to say, writing this blog feels like sitting in a cave. Is anybody going to see this?


98Heap said...

We took the kids there last Fall. The tour guide showed us a list of rules before going in, one of which was "No yelling during the 'lights-out' demonstration". Now I know why they called it "pulling a Kipp".

bettyl said...

Great story and I bet you still get evil looks on occasion!

You'd be surprised at how many folks find blogs. I didn't realize it until I installed Feedjit--and now blogspot has it's own stats. Glad you found Best Posts!

Charlene: the Polarblogger said...

I found your blog and enjoyed reading it. Keep up the good writing!

Kipp said...

Charlene - thanks for stopping by...from Sweden! Come visit as often as you like.