Saturday, March 19, 2011

Comfort clothes

I love to come home after a difficult, stress filled day and get in my comfort clothes.  The kids usually greet me at the door with a big hug and screams of "Daddy's home!"  After listening to all three of my live-in girls welcome me, typically all at once, I make my way back to my room to change clothes.  By the way, I grew up with just one brother.  I can never remember one time when I followed him into his room to continue a conversation while he got dressed, peed, or any other activity usually reserved for the privacy of one person. 

As the girls are still telling me about their day I change into my polyester based gym shorts.  My youngest stops her story briefly: "I see London.  I see France.  I see Daddy's underpants."  I pull up my shorts and turn around to see her head tilted back in laughter with one hand on her stomach and one hand lazily pointing in my direction.  I start after her, "Why don't you get out of here?"  Her and her sister scurry out of my room still laughing.  I then shed my work shirt and sweaty pit stained undershirt, trading them in for one of my favorite shirts that has more holes than a noodle strainer.  Ah...comfort clothes.

On most weekends my routine is to pick up my comfort clothes from off the bedroom floor where they were removed or I grab them off the chair where they were thrown over from the bed.  Getting up before the girls on Saturday's I try my best to cook breakfast for them.  It is a small family tradition but we all seem to enjoy it immensely.  (I get a clue how much they like it on the days I do not serve pancakes) I like cooking the flapjacks in the peace and quiet while drinking my first cup of coffee preparing everything before the girls wake up.  The girls enjoy being served as soon they get up and eating the fun-shaped pancakes.

This one particular morning we had some extras, turkey bacon and Conecuh sausage, to go with the traditional "daddy makes the best pancakes" breakfast.  Before the two youngest girls had crawled out of bed my bride walked in the kitchen to fix her traditional oatmeal.  She approaches me, hugs my back and draws in a big deep breath as I stood in front of the stove frying up the turkey bacon.  In her best 'that smells really good I may have pancakes, sausage, and bacon this morning instead of oatmeal' smiling voice she says excitedly "Your cooking bacon and sausage?!"  

My quick witted response was "Yes but the bacon and sausage is only for those of us that have been good this week.  Those on the bad list have to eat oatmeal.  Let's see, who is on the bad list?"  

Before I was given an opportunity to answer my question my bride in one quick motion releases her hug and jerks my polyester gym shorts and underpants straight down to the floor.  She steps back to admire her work.  Then says, "I will tell you who I know on the moron list!"  

I turn toward her to let her gloat in her accomplishment.  When she takes a breath from laughing after successfully pantsing* her husband at the stove she says "Hey you might want to be careful and not burn your..." I interrupted her "...BREAKFAST.  No I am not going to burn my breakfast!"

I have added a new step to my comfort routine.  I have started tying the draw string on my favorite comfortable polyester shorts.  I never know when I might say something provoking the woman of the house to covertly pants me.
* pantsing or used as a verb, pants - removing ones pants without permission of the one wearing said pants.


SherilinR said...

that's great! since i only work 2 days a week & even then i'm cleaning houses, i've gotten ridiculously sloppy & tend to live in my comfy clothes most of the time.
you never followed your family members around while they attended to private events so you could keep talking? man, you missed out!
nothing says fun like a sudden & unexpected pantsing!

Clipped Wings said...

I'm begining to like your wife more and more, lol. I too live for comfort clothes at end of work day and being bra free-oops! Love your story. You're quite a wonderful daddy and husband.

Kipp said...

sherilin - Had I followed my brother into those places I probably would not be here today. =)
I am learning more and more about the female mind. But please do not interpret that into me saying I am starting to understand women...just that I am learning more.

Clipped - she (my wife) is an amazing woman. Comfort clothes rock! Thank you.

EmptyNester said...

What a wonderful family!

I would pants Hubs but he always thinks of it as foreplay. LOL

Donna Perugini said...

The way you wrote this brought up the smells of the cooking, giggling and triumph of pantsing.
Very nicely done!

I've seen people wearing their comfort clothes while shopping at the malls in bedroom slippers and pajama bottoms, but no nightgowns yet. I guess they really need comfort!

Just threw out my ratty sweat pants. It took awhile as I had to break in the new pair of sweat pants over a year. Release of the old ripped,holed ones took a lot of mental preperation!

Kipp said...

EmptyNester - sounds like the making one of those Cialis commercials. =)

Donna - Thank you!
Have you seen the emails going around about the people of Wal-Mart? They are worse than mall people.
It does takes a lot to pass the torch from our favorite pair to our next favorite pair.

roughneckturtle/Jeff C. said...

Nice little tradition ya got going there. And, I definatley understand the comfy clothes. I have mine for sure, and taking off my boots at the end of the day is almost as good as... ummm.... marital relations....

Kipp said...

Jeff - I hear ya big man. I bet your dawgs are barkin' after what they go through.
That reminds me, I been meaning to watch that John Wayne movie about roughneckin'. Hell Fighters I think its called...

Mrs. Tuna said...

I confess to the yoga pants and tee shirt saga. Now if I could only convince myself to actually do yoga I'd be better off.

Kipp said...

Mrs. Tuna - I wear running shoes...but I cannot tell you the last time I ran.

Anonymous said...

I too love comfort clothes. Putting them on says, "I'm home!"
Jeff has done the pantsing thing to me before and it is rather unnerving. He sure got a good laugh!
I enjoyed your story and hearing about your family moments. It's what life is all about-- family.

Kipp said...

PAMO - if you have not returned the "pantsing" is time. You should get him back. =)